‘Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus.’ I told them when they asked me to write.
It was a pleasantly warm summer afternoon. I was going through a big load of accumulated mails in my office inbox. (How these mails accumulated owing to the sinister actions of a mosquito is a tale for another day.) I opened a mail that merrily explained us how AGL has hatched a genius plan of self – marketing by being active on social handles and by blogging. My contribution was expected. An evil grin spread across my mind. They had clearly not heard of or put their trust in the Latin saying, ‘Never Tickle a Sleeping Dragon.’
Due to a cumbersome self – critical process I have let little that I have written, see the light of day. I am a reluctant writer. I will therefore need what I write to at least please self. Now on a scale of ‘You are a big dull dud’ to ‘I can’t believe you wrote this’ I am more inclined to the later. But an approval on my official thought piece should not be too much of a problem as we recently witnessed our India Head, Rakesh Yadav deliver a presentation to Google counterparts with the F word on one of the slides. Thus any request for edits, censors or deletions by the official review committee shall be promptly redirected to this place.
So far, this thought piece is neither professional nor informative. What, one might wonder, is the purpose of my ranting then? You may be wise to see this as a dip stick test for the interest quotient of my future thought pieces. Once I submit this, there can arise one of two scenarios,
Review Team Verdict Case One :
This is nothing compared to all the crazy, non-consequential gab we have in the name of ‘All Hand Meet’, ‘Target Discussion’ and ‘Festival/Achievement Celebration’. You thought this would get stopped?! That’s just crazy talk! We are okay as long as work gets done and we don’t spot anyone playing tic-tac-toe on their butt cheeks.
My Reaction :
Damn! What was I thinking?! I should have tested my luck with some real swear words like ‘bollocks’, ‘nitwit’, ‘balderdash’. Anyway, I shall open my mind and my wings and soar up into the limitless skies of random thoughts (restricted within office) and let my fingers wander freely. (On the keyboard! Seriously, people…)
Review Team Verdict Case Two :
This is to notify you, M/s. Sayantani Dutta, that we are printing out your “thought piece” (yeah right!) as we speak in order to introduce it to one of man’s most ingenious inventions. Fire. (There’s an F word for you.)
You are further notified that your services are no longer required. You clearly have no sense of propriety and we shudder to think that we allowed you to speak with our esteemed clients for about three years! (Oh, The Horror!).
Kindly vacate your seat at the earliest and BE GONE WOMAN!
My Reaction :
God Sayantani! How many times have I reminded you, Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus!
P.S. For the openness-of-mind challenged, Rakesh, in his presentation, had asked us to ‘have Fun’.